Raddison Blu

I am sorry I treated you as if you weren't there
I am sorry I treated you like a medical diagnosis
I am sorry I did not listen to my heart
because kitsch is only fashionable as emoticons among my generation.
I am sorry I decided upon you with criteria that were made by others, implanted into my head
I am sorry I divided you into pros and cons
I am sorry I did not learn from sending you away
I am sorry I invited wrong voices and people into our womb
I am sorry I permitted  rationality and fear to win over intuition
I am sorry the anesthesia worked so quickly
I am sorry that I am not well and that I am not trying hard enough to be well
I am sorry I cry about you mostly when the fictional world abstracts you
I am sorry I am not the one whom I though I was
I am sorry I can never explain myself to you
I am sorry I could not make him see you
I am sorry I wanted to get rid of the sickness you caused me
I am sorry I can't let you go.